Only 1 Body

Hi, it's Laura,

When I started to write this morning, I started complaining about how hot it is already and how much running in the heat stinks. How much my foot hurts and how frustrating it is that they cannot fix the orthotic so my feet don't fall asleep while running. This is until I went to the gym and then I changed my mind about what I wanted to write.

I consider myself very lucky to be who and what I am. It has taken nearly 45 years to get here and I know that that the project of me will never be complete. I try to make myself a better person all the time and all of the time that is not easy. Keeping boundaries and keep yourself first while taking care of others is a daily struggle but I am aware of the struggle and I embrace it.

What brought all of this on you ask? Two things: an article that I read in the times a few weeks ago and woman I saw at the gym this morning.

I will start with the woman from the gym this morning.

I was thinking about describing her in full detail but best you use your imagination. I myself was working hard, moving from one exercise to the next to get & keep my heart rate up. Of course I situated myself directly behind her while she was on the lat pull down machine. This was not really my intention merely but the way the gym is set up. I did not have a choice. I studied her out of the corner of my eye. Mind you, she is not your typical JCC gym member. As I watched her, I was looking for how much weight she was using and her technique. All the while, I was admiring what she has done to herself. (Can I say a fine specimen?) I could not quite place her age. She was not 50 and definitely not 20. She had beautifully sculpted arms and back. As I watched, I reminded myself not to compare  myself to her. I have no idea where she is on her journey in life and I would be completely unfair to me to start doing that to myself. My journey to get here is not anyone else's and they should not compare themselves to me either.

It’s hard to not compare yourself to other people whether they are on magazine covers, catalogs or someone you pass on the street. (I used to want to run very fast for long distances but I have short legs and that is never going to happen.) Everyone is on a different path in life. We're born with different genetics. We just happened to end up in the same place at the same time. Wherever that place is that you come across each other, there is no way to know if that is the destination or just a stop along the way.

My second inspiration is an article I saw in the NY Times a few weeks ago: I Am Not This Body. When I finished reading that article I thought how very sad it is that the author feels this way about himself. (Please read the article, hyperlink above.)

It also got me thinking about what I love about myself. This is not meant to be conceited in any way.

I am not embarrassed by my body. My body is beautiful in its own special, unique way. So is yours by the way.

I do not walk around lockers room naked [Editor’s note: The JCC locker rooms are famous for its lack of clothing]. I do have modesty but I am not going to hide behind a closet door until the coast is clear.

My body is a gift that I need to take care by feeding and watering it. Sounds so simple right? The science here can get a little complicated but lean protein & leafy greens is a good start.

I am proud of my legs. They are strong and powerful and have carried me hundreds of miles with many hundreds of more left to go in my life I hope.

I am fascinated with how the body works. If you give it protein and water and exercise it will shrink. If you smother it with cigarettes and drugs and alcohol it doesn't quit it adapts to keep you alive. (I call that too many episodes of Intervention.) It’s amazing what it can adapt to do.

The author of the Times article talks about how disgusting our inner workings are to him. Blood and vomit and mucus. (Oh my, had to do it.) Granted these are not the most pleasant things the human body can do. It is the body's way of talking to you and telling what is wrong and what is right. Our guts and kidneys don't speak English (kind of like The Dog) and have no other way to communicate.

I can go on for days about his article and how sad I am for him and happy I am that I have the body that I have. Everything seems to be working correctly for now and I do everything in my power to make my internal workings job a little easier by giving my body the right things.

Which brings me back to my original thought influenced by both of these events.

You are beautiful both inside and out. Do not discredit yourself because someone else has blonde hair or long legs or a V shaped back. Do not feel bad about yourself because clothing companies cut pants in batches of 100 which make every single pair different even though they all have the same size on them. That is a cookie cutter mold and you are not. (They are also out to make money. making custom jeans for everyone would be very expensive.)

Embrace our differences instead of thinking them as inadequate. Love yourself (at least try) because there is only one of you.

Laura